Create the relationship you've always wanted
Virtually all of us desire a caring, trusting, loving, powerful relationship with our intimate partner. Too many of us do not experience this kind of relationship. Or we experience it in tiny moments that do not last, and we wish for so much more.
It's a commonplace for a therapist to say "I work with relationship problems." It's more accurate to say that I work with you to find and use opportunities in your relationship for relief from suffering, and for growth, change and renewal for the better. Although, of course, those two--suffering and growth--are closely intertwined. Carl Jung, famously, said: "Seldom, or perhaps never, does a marriage develop into an individual relationship smoothly and without crises; there is no coming to consciousness without pain." And sure, a commitment to work is involved here. Pain years in the making is not resolved at once. At the same time, the sweet taste of a better relationship is worth the work.
I want to make a particular plea to couples who sense trouble in their relationship, but overall things seem "ok." THIS is the time to get some help. Not when the relationship is on the edge of an abyss. I have worked with many couples, and the couples who get help at the first signs of trouble generally have brief, satisfying experiences in therapy, their relationships far stronger for the long-term. Why? Because there is still trust between the partners. No-one has yet committed some act so damaging that it destroys all trust. When that happens, the project of rebuilding the relationship is extremely difficult. Not impossible, but odds in favor are lower. So if you are uneasy about how your relationship feels to you, now is the time to do something. Not years from now.
Note that relationship improvement can happen in individual therapy as well as couple therapy, if one partner will not come, for whatever reason, the other partner can benefit from some help themselves. I always urge people to seek therapy together in such situations, but sometimes that's not possible. And I work with all kinds of relationship problems: couples, family, friends, work. If it's interpersonal, and so many trying situations are interpersonal, let's meet to see if I can be of help.
Finally, I offer a form of pre-couples'counseling known as Discernment Counseling. This particular counseling protocol was developed, and is constantly refined, by Bill Doherty of the Doherty Relationship Institute in Minnesota. It is designed to help couples who are in crisis, on the brink of separation and/or divorce. The counseling helps couples make a clear decision about whether to stay in the relationship as it is, end the relationship, or commit to intensive couples' counseling for a period of 6 months. Discernment counseling is time-limited, a highly focused process of clarifying desires and goals. It is NOT couples' counseling itself, but, rather a process couples engage in to decide whether they want to commit to longer-term couples' counseling to remake their relationship.
13001 Seal Beach Blvd. Suite 360 Seal Beach, CA 90740
Areas of Practice
Is your intimate relationship a minefield of frustration and suspicion, anger and fear? Do you yearn for a loving, gratifying relationship of mutual understanding and compassion, that makes plenty of room for growth and change? I have helped many couples find exactly that and I can help you find it too.
I can help you with major life-transitions, whatever they may be: beginning a career or ending one; career change and loss; personal change and loss and grief.
trauma therapy & EMDR
If you suffer from PTSD I can help, using both EMDR and the Trauma Resilience Model methods. These brief, powerful protocols will help you reprocess and heal both the effects of trauma and the memories themselves.
If you're a high-creative, an actor, writer, artist, musician, performer of any kind, I can help you find the energy, confidence and hope to do your work. My past work in performance helps me to understand the particular problems you face.
Use the form below to contact me with any questions or concerns you might have.